My wife and I recently had the opportunity to read a fascinating book by Marcus D. Nelson. Marcus is a long time follower of our blog and because of his sexual experiences; he was motivated to write a book called, Coming Up Short, “The Perspective of a Black Man with a Small Penis.”
Those of us with small penises know how difficult it can be to deal with this in our sex lives. Throw in myths and stereotypes and it can really be a challenge. For example, I’m tall, fairly well built and have always been athletic, and consequently women have always “assumed” that I would have a big penis. Despite the fact that we know that height and body type has nothing to do with penis size that “myth” continues. An even greater myth and stereotype is that all black men have big penises. This of course, isn’t true either, but it’s something rarely talked about. Fortunately, Marcus decided to be open about it and share his experiences.
After reading his book, we felt this was an important and relevant subject to bring up on the blog, and Marcus agreed to do this interview with us. We hope you enjoy it.
(1) Can you provide us with a little bit of your background? (I.e., age, body type, and penis size – just a general description is fine. Just share whatever you’re comfortable with)
I’m a Midwest guy—born and raised in Iowa. I’m 25 years-old, caramel colored, and have a semi-muscular, athletic body—about 170 pounds at around 5ft7 or 5ft8. My flaccid penis is just around 3 inches and sits on top of a small, tight nut-sac. Erect, I’m a little over 5 inches with a girth close to 5.25 inches. Because of my girth being a little more than my length, my penis has a stubby look to it and looks even shorter than it really is.
(2) You’re a regular follower of our blog, how did you find us, and what appeal does it have for you?
I found Love Small Penis by just googling ‘small penis’ or ‘little dick’ this and that. About a year-and-a-half ago, I began looking for porn with smaller penises and websites that center around small penises. I like how Love Small Penis truly does cover any and every thing to do with small penises without watering it down. Love Small Penis is just really honest and doesn’t poke fun or focus on the humorous aspects of having a small penis, which is something society has a tendency to do it seems. The articles are insightful and keep me coming back.
(3) What inspired you to want to write this book?
Writing this book had been on my mind for years, but I didn’t really know if I could do it or not, nor was I sure if anyone would even be interested in reading the perspective of a black man with a small penis. It seems to be a hard topic to find much about and there is so much to be said about and by the black men that don’t fit into the cultural myth or stereotype. It’s one thing for a white man to have a small penis—almost expected by some. However, when a black man is less than six inches, it is damn-near a crime.
I would have to say what finally pushed me over the edge to write Coming up Short was measuring my penis at 23 or 24 years-old and finding it hadn’t grown one centimeter since I was 10 or 11. Having a roommate with a huge penis (literally close to 10 inches erect and probably 5.5. to 6 soft) was also a big inspiration in a way. It is fascinating how different our perspectives and experiences are, as well as our preferences in sex period.
(4) How has your view of your penis size changed and evolved over time?
Naturally, I wanted a bigger penis when I was a teenager. As I talk about in Coming up Short, I ordered penis enlargement pills when I was in middle school because I was basically petrified of growing up and having a small penis. Growing up, I listened to what teenage girls and adult women said about men. A small penis always seemed to be a negative mark for a man and it just scared me, especially since black men are “supposed” to having the biggest sizes.
Now, I love being a black man and not having the “big black dick.” I like not fitting into the stereotype and that’s mostly what I wanted to convey with Coming up Short. I used to see my penis size as a disadvantage, and maybe to some it is. Now, I see it as an advantage.
(5) You wrote an entire chapter on compensating for your small penis. Do you think this is necessary and if so, how do you personally compensate for it?
I feel like compensating is necessary in life period. We all do it for something or another. This notion of “not having to compensate,” I think, is a little silly. However, society has taught us what is okay to compensate for and what isn’t. And I don’t think that is something society needs to decide for you.
I personally compensate for my size by being great at giving oral sex, using sex toys, and maintaining a nice body, among a few other things. Great oral sex definitely helps to level the playing field for lesser-endowed men. Sex toys (strap-ons, dildos, etc.) reach places I can’t that may need to be reached sometimes. The nice body helps with being more attractive. With all of those things, and some others, people can and will overlook a penis that may be less than they would like.
(6) You describe yourself as bisexual and you wrote candidly about having a number of “same sex” experiences. In your view, who is more “size focused” men or women?
I have found that men seem to be more “size focused” than women. However, I do have to say that my same-sex experiences have only been with other black men. I have not been fortunate enough to have any experiences with white men.
A big penis is often equated with masculinity while a small penis is not. Since most men want a big, or bigger, penis, when they seek other men, it seems to be the natural thing to gravitate toward one with a bigger penis. This is to not say that women are not size focused, but in my experience, with black women I should add, they can be size focused, but not nearly as much as men. Women seem to let the emotional and character traits fill in the gap if need be, while men have been more about the sexual or physical.
(7) In your book, you described being extremely turned on by “Sloppy Seconds.” What is the appeal for you personally and why do you enjoy them so much?
Sloppy seconds are the best thing since sliced bread! I think it’s unfortunate that they have a sort of negative connotation. I would have to say I have two reasons for finding sloppy seconds appealing: physical and mental. The physical feeling is really indescribable—silky, wet, gushy, warm. To be frank, it makes my penis feel like it is getting a soft, wet massage.
The mental appeal is the kick I get from knowing I have a small penis and I’m enjoying a well-fucked pussy—a pussy that “work” has already been put into by something longer and thicker. I’m enjoying the “rewards,” so to speak. I see men with huge penises in locker rooms or porn and think to myself: Damn, I want to feel a woman after he’s been inside of her!
(8) If you could offer any advice to a guy who has a small penis and was still struggling with it, what advice would you give?
Like my former roommate said, accept your limitations. This isn’t always the easiest thing to do, but it can be done and when it is done, life is just easier. With shorter strokes, for example, I slip out far less than when I try to do long strokes like men with long penises. Quite frankly, when a man with a small penis tries to overstep his boundaries, it only magnifies that he lacks in the size department. This can kill the mood, especially when the person may even be in to the man and his small penis.
I think when a man with a small penis opens his mind to compensating, either with toys or giving oral, or to other types of sex, such as cuckolding, he will find less of a struggle with his size. Many nights, my girlfriend grabs my butt in missionary, signaling she needs deeper penetration. I could get offended and ruin the mood completely, or be a man about it and get the strap-on or dildo. So, I say accept your limitations, open your mind, and be willing to try other things. For years, I tried to last longer than my usual five minutes (with a condom on). I only disappointed myself when lasting all night long clearly is not something I am meant to do. That time and effort can be spent on things that I am good at.
(9) What is the best way for your readers to interact with you?
I’m kind of anti-social media. I think a lot of it is for show and is very superficial and doesn’t really bring anyone closer to you. Rather, I like people to simply email me: email@example.com. I love holding conversations with anyone that likes to talk about penis size and sexuality. No email will go unanswered!
(10) For those who are interested in reading your book, where can they find it?
Coming up Short: The Perspective of a Black Man with a Small Penis is available exclusively on Amazon.com as an eBook. If the success of the eBook is what I hope it to be, I’d like to have copies printed and go to sexuality conventions and or conferences, wherever those are, and sell signed copies and interact with people on a personal level. Maybe one day I will be able to do this! Here is the Amazon.com link:
Thank you for the Interview!