There have recently been a number of comments about the power dynamics a woman has over her husband’s small penis. In an earlier article, “A Wife’s Power over Her Husband’s Small Penis,” back in January, Steve touched on it to some extent, but he encouraged me to offer a woman’s perspective on the psychology and power dynamics behind this issue.
The Beginning: As I have stated previously, our relationship changed for the better once Steve accepted his small penis. When he did, it finally allowed him to be who he really was sexually, and it can be very enlightening for anyone to discover their true sexual identity. The truth is Steve is a small endowed, submissive male in the bedroom. The problem for us initially was it took me a while to fully understand and comprehend the dynamics and implications of his new “revelation.” But, through many discussions, and over the course of several months, I finally got it, and I realized there was a whole new world of exciting sexual possibilities for us.
Becoming Cock Centric: My husband obsesses about his penis, as do most men. It’s the symbol of their manhood, and any real or perceived disadvantage in this area can have a profound effect on them. One of the things I knew I needed to do was to become more “cock centric” myself. It was important for me to learn how small endowed men think, and the implications of having a small penis. My husband initially requested that I refer to his penis as small. I didn’t understand this desire, but, with some trepidation, I waded in to the small penis waters and tested his reaction to my acknowledgement that he was small. The effect it had on him was swift and profound. To say that he liked it would be an understatement, no he loved it! These initial, very positive experiences, led me to be more vocal about his small penis.
Where does the source of power originate? I can’t speak for all couples, but for us, when Steve accepted his small penis, it led him directly to acknowledge to himself that he knew I was settling for less. It was liberating for Steve to acknowledge this to me. But, it wasn’t until I openly confirmed it was true, that I realized the potential of power it gave me in the relationship.
Levels of Power: When it comes to the power that a woman enjoys over her husband’s small penis, it can run the gambit. There is a fine line between the excitement/satisfaction of being mildly put in one’s sexual place versus submitting to deep humiliation. For example, some women enjoy being very dominant over their small-endowed husbands. These women may exhibit this power by having their hubby’s wear a cock cage, withhold sex from their husbands for months, maybe even indefinitely, and lead him into deeper submission and perhaps demonstrate their power and his submissiveness by openly humiliating him. The power they wield over their husbands is thorough and complete, and even extends to all facets of their relationship, where hubby willingly does all of her chores, runs her errands, etc. While this is a more extreme version of this power exchange, there are many couples that enjoy this dynamic.
We are attracted to a more subtle form of this dynamic, and what the author Alex Hathaway calls, “sensual domination.” When we were both able and willing to acknowledge Steve had a small penis, it didn’t change the love or commitment we had for each other, but it did necessitate a new kind of sexual honesty in our relationship. We had many long talks about the submissive-dominant dynamic in sex. For us, the reality in our relationship is Steve is a small endowed, sexual submissive in the bedroom. He knows that my preference is for a more alpha, dominant male and that I would submit willingly to such a male. But I have found that I have the power to tease him, about his lack of cock, which challenges him to be more aggressive sexually.
Consequently, I know I’m Steve’s female dominant, and as a result, I have assumed a more aggressive role in our sexual relationship. It has changed the entire dynamic of our sex life, and I must confess it has changed for the better.
How I Demonstrate Power Over My Husbands Small Penis: One interesting thing I quickly discovered is, I realized I had more sexual power in our marriage than Steve does. But, like many small endowed men, I think he realized this power shift before I did, and he welcomed and embraced it. When I realized the power this gave me, I chose not to abuse it but instead to tease him with it and keep him continuously on edge. While he is content for me to exercise this power solely for my own enjoyment, I do take into account how it will affect our relationship. Some examples of how I demonstrate power over my husband’s small penis include:
- I frequently acknowledge that Steve has a very small penis. The more I remind him the better.
- I acknowledge the difference between a penis (small) and a cock (big). Steve has a penis, and other men have cocks. In fact, my dildos are cocks and Steve knows this.
- Prior to sex, I may express my desire for a cock (dildo) and when I do, the cock will always go first, and Steve will gladly settle for the sloppy seconds.
- There may be some nights when all I need is a cock and not a penis at all, and he accepts this fact.
- I like to sexually challenge him to try and satisfy me like I know a man with a big cock could. All I have to do is throw down this gauntlet and his reaction is amazing.
- I like to subtly hint, imply or openly express my big cock curiosity. See my previous article on “What am I missing.” Steve gets really turned on by this and so do I. I like to keep him guessing.
- Similarly, we both know Steve is a small-endowed, submissive cuckold, and the implication of that reality. Reminding him of this also keeps him on his toes.
As you can see from the two examples given, the extent of power a woman has over her small endowed husband, and how she exercises that power, can vary from relationship to relationship. Where couples fit on this continuum and what they want to include and not include, is totally up for them to decide.
How Does This Power Shift Occur? Who initiates a power shift such as this in a relationship? Often times, the small endowed man will initiate it because he feels like it’s a natural place for him to be. However, there are some relationships, where a dominant female will initiate it because she instinctively knows it will work and she enjoys the complete power it gives her in the relationship. Some couples may even arrive at this decision jointly. So, it can vary and depends on the individuals involved.
The Advantages: The advantages to the woman having more sexual power in a relationship cannot be overstated. Ever since we began our journey down this road, Steve has been more focused on my sexual pleasure. And, it’s not like he was an inconsiderate lover before, because he was always very attentive to my needs. But there is something different now. We now have more sex, and even better sex, and it’s no coincidence, rather it’s directly related to this power shift and our sexual honesty. I have even noticed that his desire to please me has even extended outside the bedroom. He is calmer, more agreeable, and much more willing to do things with me and for me, and not because he’s a doormat because he isn’t, it’s because he wants to.
How do the rest of you feel about the sexual power dynamics in a relationship?