Cuckolding: Why Women Have Legitimate Concerns About It

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The topic of cuckolding is one of the most popular subjects we have introduced and continue to discuss on the Blog.  It’s also one of the more controversial.   Some of our readers are openly in cuckold relationships, while many, many others desire to explore this kind of relationship with their partner, and yes, we do have those who have no interest in the subject whatsoever.

Those of you who have followed our blog know that Steve desires that I cuckold him.  While he makes it no secret that he desires this kind of relationship, I think he has done a really good job in being objective in his treatment of it. I thought his article, “Is Cuckolding A Viable Relationship Alternative?” posted on January 12, 2014 was especially helpful.  We have also introduced and explored Fantasy Cuckolding, which is a less risky alternative to the real thing, but is still a lot of fun.

One of the issues related to cuckolding that we haven’t covered in much depth is a woman’s concerns about it.   We were recently contacted by a few women that have asked us if we could share our thoughts on the subject specifically in terms of those concerns women typically have about it.   I thought this was an excellent idea for an article, because if you do any searching about cuckolding on the Internet, you don’t often see anything written about legitimate concerns a woman might have about it.  Instead, what you’re likely to find is how great of a lifestyle it is, and if they list any concerns women might actually have, they are often downplayed or even dismissed.

Since Steve and I have seriously considered entering into a cuckold lifestyle ourselves, I thought I could at least share my personal thoughts, and the host of concerns I have as a married woman who is considering it.  So, what I have attempted to do is address the concerns I have, and I think most women would have many of these same concerns if their husband ever approached them about engaging in such a lifestyle.  I have broken them down into three categories:  (1) Initial Concerns, (2) Secondary Concerns, and (3) Final Concerns.  All are equally important and should be considered with the utmost care and respect of both parties.

Initial Concerns:

  • Why does he want me to do this?  This is the first question any woman will ask themselves.  This question will then quickly be followed up with others such as, is he unhappy with our sex life?  Why does he want me to have sex with another man?  We may even think he has some sinister motive for asking us to consider this.  Does he think I’m a slut, and by agreeing to do this, it will “prove” it to him?  Or, is he really looking for an excuse to have sex with other women?  These are legitimate questions most women will ask.  I consider myself to be very sexually open and willing to try almost anything, but when Steve said that cuckolding would really turn him on, to be honest, I was floored.  The prospective cuckold thinks and might even say, “This is a great idea! You get to have all the sex you want, with whomever you want, whenever you want, what’s not to like?” Most “would be” cucks think any woman would sign up for this without a second thought, and unfortunately, those that do, are usually doing so for all the wrong reasons, and tend to regret it.  What’s far more common is they will think about this proposition and all of the associated questions for a very long time.  Some may even reject it outright initially.
  • What is his real motivation? I don’t’ know about the rest of you, but in my husband’s case, he wanted me to experience big cock sex.  Even though I had perfectly great sex with my husband despite the fact that he has a very small penis, I know this was his major motivation.  How did I know?  Well, every time he talked about it, his little penis would become stiff instantly.  Hard cocks (small or large) don’t lie, and his erection proved to me that seeing me with a man who had a larger cock was definitely the motivation behind it as far as Steve was concerned.  Plus, the fact that I have never had big cock sex was another motivation behind it for him.  I know the idea really, really turned him on, and he wanted me to be able to experience something he could not give me and which I had never experienced before.  As I became more and more familiar with the Blog, and in talking to many other small endowed men, I discovered that his motivation was not only sincere, but was also shared by many small endowed men, who have the same fantasy.

So, once I understood why he wanted me to do this and the motivation behind it, did I jump immediately on board?  Not at all, because to be honest, I knew there was much, much more to consider.  In fact, I should also point out, that just wrapping my arms around these initial concerns and even understanding his motivation behind it weren’t resolved in my head overnight.  Rather, I spent months just trying to sort it all out.

Secondary Concerns:

  • Considering a new paradigm: I grew up believing in the concept of traditional marriage.  Therefore, even though I was sexually very open, I had trouble embracing and accepting the concept of a nontraditional marriage.  I would venture to guess most women grew up believing similarly, so how do you introduce another man into your relationship, and reconcile that with your long held view of monogamy?  This is definitely not easy, and for many women, it’s impossible no matter how enticing it might sound.  To embrace it means accepting a new relationship paradigm, which is not easy for a woman to do.
  • Will you view your husband differently? This is a concern that I believe most women would have.  Will you view him in some way as less “manly,” or will you consider him to be simply enlightened?    If the other man is sexually superior, does that lessen your husband in your eyes?  If it is better, will you lose respect for him, or will you view him in a more positive light since he encouraged you to explore this?
  • How will cuckolding impact the sex life you have with your partner? Will this spur him on to really compensate and compete for you?  Will you want to have more sex with him or less sex?  And, what do you do if he wants to abdicate all of his responsibility for sexually satisfying you to your Bull?
  • Emotional/Physical Attachment: Another major issue is what if the wife becomes emotionally attached to her new Bull?   This is another important consideration to discuss and should not be downplayed.  It is a real fear of many women who consider this activity.  For a cuckolding arrangement to work the woman has to be able to separate out sex from the emotional involvement.  And, don’t forget it can work both ways, what if her Bull becomes emotionally attached to her?  It’s not just women who can become emotional about sex, men can too.  The reality for most women is, there at least has to be a physical attraction for the other male, and depending on whether or not it is an ongoing arrangement, an emotional attachment could develop too.

Final Concerns:

So, you have gotten this far, and you think you might be ready to cuckold your husband right?  Are there even more concerns and issues to contemplate?  Yes and here are some of the more obvious ones to me.

  • The Manipulative Cuck: I have communicated with enough cucks and “would be” cucks to know that some can be VERY manipulative.   They often suggest cuckolding in the first place because it excites them and makes their little penises stiff.  But, then they want to be in control and choreograph the entire scenario.  They may even want to tell you what size cock your Bull should have, or even want to select YOUR Bull.  They may have the whole scenario laid out where they want to be there and watch, and stroke off, or participate in some fashion.  Some may even want to video tape the entire session.  It’s as if their cuckoldress is their own personal porn queen.  For me, this begs the question, who is really in control here?  Is it the “submissive” cuck, or the dominant cuckoldress?  In this scenario, the submissive cuck has manipulated his cuckoldress to do exactly what he wants.  I don’t know about the rest of you prospective cuckoldresses out there, but this doesn’t work for me. If I decide to cuckold my husband, he knows it’s my pussy, and my rules, which is the way it should be.
  • Selecting Your Bull: Selecting your Bull sounds easy enough, but it really isn’t.  Do you prefer the Bull to be single, married but in a dysfunctional sexual relationship (if he is married, this could cause a lot of problems for obvious reasons), or newly divorced where he wants sex, but may not have the resources to date traditionally, and may even have a place to play.  Do you look for a Bull at a local bar, or go out of town to find one?  Do you advertise on the Internet at one of the numerous Married Women Dating Sites, or look elsewhere?  If you find a Bull, is it a one-time thing, or are you looking for a Bull who will service you on a regular basis?  These are all major questions that must be answered BEFORE you even begin your search.
  • There is no “Reset” Button:  Once you cuckold your husband, there is no turning back.  It’s not like you can undo what has been done, so it’s like the saying, “be careful for what you wish for, because you might just get it.”  It’s often been said when a couple considers swinging, that the husband drags his wife kicking and screaming to their first swingers party, but then has to take her home kicking and screaming because she wants to stay.  It can be similar with cuckolding, once you introduce it to her, she may come to really enjoy the sexual variety, and not want to give it up.  The reality that every “would be” cuckold must face is, once your wife experiences the raw, masculine power of a thick 8” cock between her legs, she may not view sex with her husband in the same way again, but by then, there is no going back.
  • Personal Safety: A woman and even a couple’s participation in this activity require common sense, and considering personal safety, should be at the TOP of the list. In addition, how much personal information you should divulge, if any is another VERY serious consideration.
  • STDs: If you watch any cuckold movies or videos, you will see “cum” literally “cumming” all over the place. You will see snowballs, creampies and everything else, but what you typically won’t see are condoms.  Why?  Because it’s not as titillating as seeing cum dripping from every body cavity.  But the reality is, any sexual activity comes with risks.  Understanding those risks and taking preventative measures is essential.  Remember, when you have unprotected sex with someone new, you are having sex with everyone they ever had sex with.  Sexual safety is, or should be, of paramount importance.

Conclusion:

In conclusion, while cuckolding may be the ultimate fantasy of many guys, and can even be appealing to some women, there are obviously a whole litany of issues and concerns that must be dealt with beforehand.   To ignore them would be foolish, and even if you feel like you can honestly address all of the concerns you both have, you may still not choose to do it, instead opting for a much safer alternative of a fantasy cuckolding scenario.  Will I cuckold my husband?  That’s a good question.  One thing I have learned over the last few years is to never, say never!  :)

What do the rest of you think?  As always, we welcome your thoughts on the subject.

 

Masturbation Habits and the Small Penis

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I have recently read a number of quotes like this one:  “Studies show that small penis men masturbate three times as much as average size penis men, and ten times the rate of men with large cocks.”  I have actually seen several comments like this on the blog over the last 2-3 years, but no academic “evidence” or official studies to back it up.  I suppose the theory behind this might be that the bigger the penis the more sexual opportunities that a man has and conversely the smaller the penis results in diminished sexual opportunities.  Whether or not this is true is anybody’s guess, but in my husband’s case, it is true.  There was a time in my life when he wasn’t as sexually aggressive due to his small penis, and I know he resorted to masturbation frequently as a result.  Had he had a bigger penis, he might have been more aggressive, and thus had less of a need to masturbate.  But again, that’s just Steve.

But, since this is a small penis blog, I thought I would ask you to be honest with me and tell me about your masturbation habits.  I asked Steve to fess up and answer the following questions which he did.

How often do You Masturbate?  OK, he admitted it, when it comes to masturbation, he has been pretty prolific.  He loves stroking off, what guy doesn’t?  How often?  Well, it depends.  He might go a week without masturbating, and there might be other weeks when he jacks off daily.  If I’m out of town, well he admitted that he might stroke off 2, 3 or 4 times a day.  I guess he is what I would call an “opportunist” and will stroke off his little dick whenever possible. 

What is in your personal “Spank Bank”?  Like a lot of guys, he is pretty resourceful when it comes to masturbating.  The old Playboy, Penthouse and Hustler magazines always offered a treasure trove of masturbation fodder.  He has masturbated fantasizing about almost every conceivable female body type too.  Yes, he loves the prototypical Playboy Centerfold body, but he also “appreciates” more voluptuous women, and women of all races and body types.   I guess you could call him an “equal opportunity” masturbator!  

When the Internet came along, that opened up a whole warehouse of additional masturbation options.  Because he is a small endowed submissive, he loves watching video clips or movies of big cock, alpha males fucking.  He loves seeing a woman’s response to big cock sex, and a large cock, dominant male can fuck in virtually any position, seems to last forever and when he does cum, he cums buckets.  He often fantasizes about me being on the receiving end of such a big cock. :-)  He also admitted that it’s very erotic for him to watch a guy with a big cock masturbating because it’s so much different than how he strokes off. 

Phone sex operators?  Yep, he has done that too and said it was a lot of fun.  Internet chatting has also been a lot of fun.   He likes chatting because he said you can weave any kind of erotic scenario you want – which usually results in a very “happy ending”.   Erotic literature can and has been a source of masturbation fodder for him too.  And then there are a lot of past sexual situations or memories, that maybe even at the time turned him off, but now he finds himself being very aroused by them.  About the only thing he says he hasn’t done is web cam masturbation. 

So, obviously for Steve, when it comes to masturbation, he says you are only limited by your imagination!  

Does your wife know you jack off and how much you do it?  I know if some guy’s wives asked them if they ever jacked off, they would probably deny it.  Luckily for Steve, he and I both masturbate with equal enthusiasm and are not ashamed of it.  He masturbates more than I do, but there have been times when even I have confessed to doing it when he had no clue that I did it.

Now, how about the rest of you “little” guys out there?  How would you answer the above questions?  And, please be honest!  

Psychological Sabotage and Small Penis Sexual Performance

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We try to offer our readers a wide variety of topics that are interesting, thought-provoking and generate a lot of discussion and debate.  My wife and I love to talk and write about sex.  It’s not enough for us to just accept that something turns us on; we want to know why it turns us on.  Is there something about it that psychologically turns us on?  Is it physical or is it biological?  We find sexual exploration fascinating.  Along those lines, I’m sure the title of this post got your attention, and we are very curious to hear what your thoughts are on the subject.

When I recently published the article, Do You Wish You Had A Smaller Penis? I wanted to introduce a psychological aspect of that question, but didn’t want to muddy the waters and thought it deserved to be a standalone article on its own merits, so here it is.

It has been said by many, that our brain is our “biggest” sexual organ, and I believe that most of us would probably agree with that statement. I spoke to one of our followers recently who confessed that he could not get very hard during sex and was unable to provide any “thrusting” during intercourse at all.  I asked him if he felt it was a physical or psychological issue, and he said that it was psychological because he wanted his wife to cuckold him, and by being unsatisfactory in bed, it might increase the chances of it happening.   When I heard that, a light bulb went on for me, and I wondered, do we (small endowed men) psychologically sabotage our relationships, and if we do, is it consciously or subconsciously motivated, and how common is it?

In talking with my wife about this, we both agreed that another very common sexual problem that small endowed men have shared with us is Premature Ejaculation (PE).  This seems to be much more common among small endowed men than either of us would have thought.  Now, let me be clear, I’m not suggesting that men with PE are psychologically sabotaging their sexual performance because I simply don’t know, but I would be curious to hear from men who experience PE what they attribute it too.  Since there could be medical reasons (such as ED or PE) associated with performance issues,  I feel it’s necessary to add my usual disclaimer upfront that I’m not a medical expert, and would encourage any man who feels that they might have a medically associated sexual problem to seek help from trained physicians. Consequently, even though ED and PE could be either physically or psychologically driven, I want to avoid diving into those subjects too deeply because I don’t feel qualified to address them.  But, are there other, more obvious examples of potential psychological sabotage?

As I thought about it, I realized that I haven’t seen any studies or empirical evidence on this subject at all.  I have no idea how common it is, or whether or not it is more common among small-endowed men versus average or well-endowed men.  But it is a fascinating subject.  So, in thinking about it, I wondered if there were other examples of sexual sabotage that we gravitate to, maybe without even thinking about it or realizing it.  Perhaps there are, and might even include some of the subjects we talk a lot about on this blog for example:

  • Why do we crave SPT or SPH?
  • Why do we want our wives to use dildos that aren’t just larger than us, but substantially larger?
  • Why do we want our partners to “out” us?
  • Why do we want our partners to compare our very small penises with men who are supremely more endowed than we are?
  • Why do we love big pussy sex and “sloppy seconds?”
  • Why do we enjoy tease & denial and chastity?
  • Why do we wish we had even smaller penises?

Do we desire some or all of these things to underscore to our partners just how small and inadequate we are by comparison?  Do we subconsciously want them to desire, and perhaps even prefer larger endowed men?  Or, do we do it consciously, merely for a little SPT play to enhance our relationships?  To me, these are fascinating questions.

I had never pondered these questions personally, but in thinking about this article, I reflected on it from my own personal point of view.  What I thought was I would like to be able to say that my excitement and interest in all of these things was conscious – merely to enhance our SPT sex play.   But, if I’m honest with myself, I think many of them are subconscious, and examples of psychological sabotage efforts.  Why? Because I would love for my wife to be able to experience big cock sex.  I can’t deny that this is my ultimate fantasy and I think subconsciously, the smaller and more inadequate I feel, the more likely it is to happen.

For me, this was an important revelation.  The term psychological sabotage has a very negative connotation associated with it, but for good reason.  I don’t think it is healthy to sabotage a relationship regardless of whether it is consciously or subconsciously motivated.  The important lesson learned for me is that I can’t do anything consciously or subconsciously that is destructive to our sexual relationship.  As far as sex goes, I need to be the best lover I can be within my obvious limitations.   I need to compensate, be creative, imaginative and resourceful in the bedroom.   But, this doesn’t mean we need to stop doing any of the things listed above, but will now do them with a new light shed on them.  While I can’t deny that I would love for my wife to experience big cock sex, I can’t psychologically sabotage our relationship to make this happen.  I also can’t consciously push her in this direction either.  If it happens at all, it has to be something she wants to do and we need to agree on it in the context of our relationship.

Lastly, this is a fascinating and complex topic, and I would be very interested to know if any of you are aware of any serious research efforts on the subject.  How common is psychological sabotage in sexual relationships?  Is there any correlation between penis size and psychological sabotage?  Is there a biological component to it?  What are the typical examples of it? How does it affect relationships?

As always, I’m very curious to hear what others think about it, which leads me to today’s questions.  When it comes to your sex life:

  • Have you ever psychologically sabotaged a sexual relationship?
  • If so, do you believe it was consciously or subconsciously driven?
  • If so, what thing(s) have you done to sabotage your sexual relationship?
  • If you have sabotaged your relationship, what would you attribute it too: (a) Your desire for SPT, (b) You want to underscore your perceived inadequacy, or (c) Your desire to be a cuckold? (d) Something else?

As always, feel free to add anything else that you think is relevant to the subject, and we would enjoy hearing any thoughts you have on this fascinating topic.

Rougedmount: A Woman’s Thoughts on Sex, Relationships and Penis Size

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One of our longtime contributors, and also a fellow blogger, is a woman known as Rougedmount.  We really enjoy her contributions on our blog, and we thought it might be fun to do an interview with her that would allow her the opportunity to share her in-depth views on a variety of sex and relationships topics.

For those of you who have seen any of her posts, or checked out her blog, you know that she has an amazing gift to be able to express her thoughts on any topic. Whatever subject she writes about is always written with great clarity, rich in detail and vividly described.  She is also not bashful talking about any sexual topic and letting you know exactly what she thinks about it and why.  I know the guys on this blog really do enjoy reading an “unfiltered” view of what women really think about penis size, sex and relationships.  From that standpoint, her contributions are invaluable to all of us.

We hope you enjoy this interview with our fellow blogger and friend, Rougedmount!

Interview Questions:

  • Can you provide us with a little bit of your background?

I am attractive by some standards and generally get unwanted attention for my appearance. I certainly do not need any of the extra attention my looks combined with my words, would bring me. I think how I look has helped me to understand some of the issues a man with a small penis has. I am judged constantly on what people SEE and not what they experience. Some men LIKE my body type while others HATE it. I do not focus on those who don’t like me; instead I focus on the type of man who does. A man with a small penis has to do the exact same thing.

Who I am is complex. I am exactly the same as everyone else in that my history has shaped and defined me, but never broken me. I won’t allow it. I was an abused child, an Independent woman, I grew up too soon. I’m educated, I’m Alpha, I’m sexually submissive but only to men who are actually dominant and if they aren’t then I crush them verbally.

I get male attention. I am far from perfect but I have a presence and confidence that carries me. People always assume that “I’m someone”. I looked like Jessica Rabbit for a majority of my life and perhaps that has something to do with my disregard for my looks. People assume I am younger than I am and I have one word for them “sunscreen”. I was a child of the 80’s who didn’t look like it as I have always been ‘non-conformist’ as to what I looked like compared to others.

I can ride a motorcycle, a stick shift, a tractor and a horse all with equal skill. I sail, I kayak, I swim, I write, I sketch with Ink and do water color when I have time. I cook from scratch, I have a massive garden. I do all the home renovations and yard work.

My story is like many others. Married over 25 yrs. and was faithful for the first 22. Counselling, therapy, separation then reconciliation; repeat for 10 years. Learning he lied time and again. Learning that some things are too big to get over, even though you try for 15 years and realizing that you should never have tried to work things out in the first place.

I started writing online as a ‘diary’ and had no idea how blogging worked. I wrote for 2 yrs. before anyone read anything. One day I was curious about a little orange light that flashed while I was writing and had never seen it do that before and so I clicked on it. WOW. People could see what I write and had been commenting. There was a whole world in here I had no idea existed.

I write about my past, my present and my fantasy. I have real life mixed in with stories. I write when something comes into my head and have discovered I have writers’ Attention deficit disorder. I am very focused on writing daily now. I need it, it’s cathartic. It helps me focus and grow.

I don’t have a writing genre; I am not focused on stats or style. I write for me and if what I say holds value for others, that both amazes me and inspires me to continue expressing myself.

  • You’re a regular follower and contributor of our blog, how did you find us, and what appeal or value does it have for you?

I can’t remember how I discovered your blog. I think based on how I normally find blogs, is that you may have posted something on one of my posts and so, of course, I clicked on your blog to read some of your material and know who it was who had an interest of what I was writing about. I am not a techie person (as you know) and so I have no idea how to search for certain topics.

To be honest, I never would have thought about searching for anything under “small penis” anyway. It was a topic I am more than familiar with and I thought would hold no real value to me. My spouse has one (a small penis), he kept it from me and I resent him for many years over it. I had to learn through trial and error over 17 years, what I could have read about in a few hours, if I had read your blog at the beginning of my marital journey.

Your blog gave me insight to something I had spent a lifetime, trying to figure out. It literally felt like I was seeing all the dots connect, so I could see the big picture, finally. Of course, the knowledge came too late for me in regards to my marriage plus it’s not exactly relevant as my spouse is 100% non-compliant and combative when it comes to discussing anything sexual. Even though it’s not benefited our relationship as I had hoped, it has changed things, and is changing things. I am just unsure of where they are going.

But that’s WHY I loved your blog so much. It was like I had access to other men, with the same issue my spouse had and in the various responses and conversations I read, I was learning what MAY have been going through his mind, if he ever thought to open his mouth and SAY something (anything), other than this brutal silence I’ve had to live with. I am a communicator, I need expression, and so his refusal has almost killed me. It’s damaged me in ways I can’t even find words to express.

The appeal your blog has for me is that it brings me understanding. It gives me the opportunity to express how I actually feel and then get honest response back…good and bad…which helps me grow as a woman. It’s let me appreciate men in a vastly different way than I had before and that’s been unexpected. It truly is a resource for me and I am sure many others who have marital issues, but don’t understand that they may come from a man’s image of himself and his small penis.

For years I ignored the fact my spouse had a small penis. Why would I focus on something that didn’t matter to me? I loved him, he sexually excited and pleased me and I married him because I never wanted to lose it. What mattered was he didn’t use his penis; or rather he stopped using it with me after I had kids. Once I learned that the way he acted may have had something to do with how he perceived himself, because of his penis size, it was an Aha moment for me. It won’t change my relationship with my spouse because he is adamantly opposed to moving forward, but it’s made me aware that I have to move on without him. How that will happen, I am unsure of.

  • What has surprised you the most about the small-endowed men who participate and contribute frequently on our blog?

The biggest surprise for me in reading this blog is how angry some men are at their penis size. How they blame the women in their past, the women in their future and project self-pity and shame about something they have NO control over. They seem content to remain uneducated about intimacy and orgasm and just want to focus on the ONE thing that is not possible for them, which is deep penetration and stretching a woman’s pussy by the sheer girth of a big cock.

Until reading this blog, I truly believed a man’s penis size was not something they focused on, other than in the normal aspect of penis pride that I ‘thought’ all men shared. I thought their opinions were similar to a woman’s when thinking about their own breast size. Meaning, big or small, wasn’t an issue past puberty. I had no idea a man’s small penis could impact a man’s entire sexual development or preferences. I certainly did not know that a man with a small penis would want to be teased or humiliated. That amazed me and astounded me. I came to understand the teasing and could see how it works. I learned very quickly that the opportunity was certainly there if you wanted to take advantage of it as a woman. For normal, competitive men, teasing is like being wafted with pheromones.

  • You have indicated that you are pretty open sexually, and as such, what sexual fetish, kink or fantasy turns you on the most and why, and would you ever try it?

Sexuality. It’s an awesome thing. I was virtually celibate for 22 years. Rediscovering myself has been a blessing and a curse.  Because so much of my life, the entire focus of my sexual desire, a man’s cock, was kept from me, all of my fantasies tend to surround anything to do with a hard cock or hard cocks and a man’s ejaculate. Having 1-2 lovers at the same time or having 4 men to service my sexual needs. Sigh…I can’t even start to type about it without going off on a tangent. I love a man’s body. I love how sex feels. I love when a man cums…love watching it seeing it, feeling it, touching it, tasting it. I know without a doubt I could easily live with 2-3 men and take care of all their sexual needs.

My ultimate fantasy would be to live openly in a cuckold relationship or even in a polyamorous one so I could have 2 full time partners, every single day.

  • If you were in a relationship with an attractive, small-endowed man who completely accepted himself, and was open to try anything, what would that relationship look like, and how would you expect him to compensate for his small penis size?

He would use toys on me 100% of the time before he entered me when we were at home. He would be willing to give me quickies when we were out in a public like situation, so I could feel the sweet slippery seed on my thighs when out. It simply makes me feel sexier to have cum on my thighs. He would 100% have to allow me to have lovers. My body requires penetration from a big male cock to be truly satisfied. Toys are only fine when a man is using them on me. When I need big cock sex, I need it. It’s that simple.

  • OK, I have to ask this question. When it comes to penis size, how important is it to you personally, and what is the ideal size for you?

Penis size: the best lover I have ever had, BY FAR, is perhaps 6 inches and of average thickness that is proportionate to length. He has smaller, tighter testicles. It’s not his size, it’s what he does. OMG…it’s what he does! The weight of his hands make up for any lack of weight between his legs. The demanding kisses take my breath away. By the time he enters me, he has made me so aroused that I am as close to death as you can get while still having a beating heart and even then it is skipping beats.

Jesus…his cock is an extension of his soul and when he enters me I could die from how much it fills me to every single place I never knew needed filling. And I think THAT is what a man’s penis size really is. Every woman is searching for the thing that fills her soul, the person who fills it and its why some cocks work and others don’t. Some cocks fit better because there is so much of the man in them that the size is irrelevant as they are the right size for the souls of the other person.

I’ve had much smaller and much bigger and nothing works as perfectly as this man’s cock. My preference for a cock NOT attached to this man, is about a thick 8 inches simply because I love the variety of sexual positions available and his girth will guarantee my immediate orgasm. Yes, I’ll be sore after. But that’s the point.

  • If a young, married woman came up to you in confidence and said that her husband had a very peculiar request – he wanted to be teased because he had a small penis, what advice would you give her?

This scares me. Many men ‘think’ they can handle it and can’t. Many men love the fantasy and push for the reality, they get the reality then they FREAK OUT. Here is what every woman needs to know. If you give him this request, if you give him the teasing or have it lead to an actual cuckold relationship, you HAVE TO be prepared to lose the relationship in the event it was too much for him to handle in real life. If you aren’t prepared to lose the man and the marriage in the event he DOES flip out, then don’t do it.

You cannot trust his word that he knows how he will react. He doesn’t know if he’s never had to face those feelings before. You have to have the patience of a SAINT in order for him to deal with his feelings and quite frankly, it is not going to be fun for you. He is going to struggle with accepting his own sexuality and you will be blamed and you will be resented and you will be held responsible for everything that he doesn’t like about how he feels.

Can your relationship survive you carrying it while he tries to figure things out? I would have to say that if you are verbally going to go down this path, then do it for years before you make any small attempts to transition it into the real world. Read books, watch porn together, change the lifestyle towards what you want to end up with and then start incorporating things gradually. This is the only way you can trust that he is actually ready for what he says he wants.

  • If you could offer any advice to a guy who has a small penis and you knew he was struggling with it, what advice would you give?

I am afraid I don’t have the patience right now to be kind about it. I simply don’t understand people who struggle with something you can’t change. You have a functioning penis that brings you pleasure. FUCKING USE IT.

Find someone who is aroused by it. Learn about fetish and kink. Appreciate toys and the hands you have to use them on people. Listen to how she responds and the things she says she likes and be grateful you have your hearing. Look at how wet she gets and how she spends time getting ready to be with you and appreciate your vision. I am NEVER going to be tall and leggy. I will never attract the type of man who likes tall and leggy women. Guess what?    I. don’t. care.

You will never be a heavy cock swinging, well hung bull who can pound a pussy senseless. FIND AN ALTERNATE ROUTE! Do you stand there at an intersection and carry on when the preferred road is blocked or do you discover a different road to take to get you to the same destination?  Just stop sitting there whining about the road closure and start to fucking drive!

A small penis is only an impediment to a man who lets it define him to HIMSELF. Women, a mature woman, knows what she likes and wants and will normally say if what you have is an issue for her. Be grateful she doesn’t waste your time or go about making her cum so hard she forgets what she said.

  • What is your opinion of more non-traditional relationships such as polyamory, cuckolding, swinging and Female-led relationships?

I have gone through a massive shift about my ideas on this in the last few years. Dramatic shifts. Life changing shifts.

Polyamory: while I know I could easily handle multiple relationships with multiple men, I do not think I could handle being in a relationship with a man who was with multiple women and still be in a committed relationship with him. This would play into ALL of my personal fears and insecurities. It would damage me because of my 27 yr. marriage taught me that no matter what I did or what I tried, I was not good enough. (I realize it’s not accurate but the brain works in funny ways).

Cuckolding: 100% in favour of it simply because of my past. I am highly sexual and I am highly frustrated when I don’t have sex. Sex for me is a mood stabilizer. It makes me a better person. I have no need to humiliate someone but I do have a need to speak honestly. This means that what I say in relation to cock size and feeling is going to be very open and will result in teasing for the smaller of the two men. I have to admit to being excited about having a deep emotional connection with one man while having my sexual needs met by the men who interest me sexually. Never thought that would be possible in a million years.

Swinging: It works for some people. They are far more open and honest in their marriages and relationships than I have ever been. Had my spouse been open, I may have considered it. But at this point, with this man I would be angry that he is giving to others what he withheld from me, for so many years. I would carry this insecurity with me into future relationships as it is a hardwired response now.

Female led Relationships: this one is big for me right now. In my marriage, I have to say, I was the one doing everything, managing everything, was responsible for everything. I initiated sex 100% of the time and was rejected 99.99% of the time. I became a very dominant woman because I had no choice. My nature is to be submissive to a man and his needs as it simply makes me happier to please him. As a result I have a hard time ‘taking’ or being sexually selfish. This is why I am currently trying to break myself out of that. It’s why I have recently started exploring a few things with a Submissive (capital S) man. I have to say, that his submissiveness actually pisses me off, which makes me edgier than I normally am. His passivity reminds me of my spouse in many ways (though my spouse was passive aggressive while this man is simply passive). So his actions trigger my response which makes me into a very demanding woman.

It’s easier to be bitchy to someone when you are annoyed with them for their very nature. Because I am not pretending or role playing, it is something this submissive man finds very arousing. To be honest, part of it arouses me as well. (When I am not being floored that someone is so passive and driven to please).

My sexual personality type is hard to explain. I am exceptionally assertive and demanding. I am very confident and bold…and if I have a man who is my equal and challenges me I stand up to it and become even more domineering. If I am allowed to do it, I will. But if I have a man who quietly and gently shuts me down with amusement that I even tried to be dominant with him…sweet Jesus…my physical reaction to it leaves no doubt as to who is wearing the pants.

I know my standard and if a man falls short of it, then I control the situation and always will. It IS my natural state of being and is not even thought about. The only way I could successfully manage a female led relationship full time, is if I also had a 2nd lover who would fuck me until I could no longer think. Because THAT is what I need in order to think clearly at all and bring balance back into my life.

It’s why the submissive man wanted me. I understand that some very strong men need their submissive side to come out during sexual encounters, in order to allow them to have the balance of being such a dominant personality in their real life. I know it, because it’s exactly how I am when I am with the right sexual partner who meets my demanding nature, with one of his own.

Thanks again Rougedmount for agreeing to do this Interview with us!

 

Grading Your Wife’s Sexuality – Does She Deserve Her Degree?

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Since this is a “Love Small Penis” blog, it’s only natural we would spend most of our time talking about our small penises, but we rarely talk about our wives or girlfriends.  So, I thought it would be fun to turn the tables and mix things up, and have you reflect (in a lighthearted way) on your wives/partners overall sexuality and sexual capabilities.  This of course discounts all of the other intangibles that make her a great wife or partner, such as she’s a great companion, wonderful mother, etc.  Let’s look solely at her sexuality and sexual attributes.

So, with that in mind, please answer the following questions.

  • How would you grade your wife/partner’s overall sexual attractiveness?

Grade A – She is super-hot, in fact sizzling!

Grade B – She is definitely hotter than average

Grade C – She is probably average, but pleasantly so

Grade D – Honestly, I would have to give her a “D” – and that’s not her cup size!

Grade F – Can I trade her in? (:

  • What best describes your wife/partners appearance? In other words, how does she normally dress?

Grade A – Sexy, hot, usually showing cleavage

Grade B – Provocative, but still tasteful

Grade C – Like the School Librarian –not that there’s anything wrong with that!

Grade D – Nice, but too conservatively

Grade F – She dresses frumpy or from the last century

  • What is your wife/partner’s most attractive feature and why do you think so?
  • Eyes
  • Hair
  • Breasts
  • Ass
  • Legs
  • If another guy see’s your wife for the first time, what do you think he would zero in on, and why?
  • Eyes
  • Hair
  • Breasts
  • Ass
  • Legs
  • How would you grade your wife/partner’s sexual creativity and imagination in the bedroom?

Grade A – She is totally creative and has a vivid imagination!

Grade B – Sorry dude, she is probably more creative than your wife! :)

Grade C – She is somewhat creative

Grade D – She is stuck in her sexual box and too predictable

Grade F – She has no sexual imagination at all!

  • How would you grade your wife/partners ability at performing oral sex?

Grade A – She deep throats, swallows and asks for more!

Grade B – She deep throats but does not swallow

Grade C – She sucks my penis OK, but doesn’t rock my world

Grade D – She sucks my penis reluctantly

Grade F – Oral sex?  You’re joking right?

  • How sexually confident is your wife/partner?

Grade A – She is supremely confident and it shows!

Grade B – She is very confident

Grade C – She’s somewhat confident but not overly so

Grade D – She lacks sexual confidence due to a body image/other perceived problem

Grade F – She has no sexual confidence at all

  • How often does she want sex?

Grade A – Daily, she is insatiable!

Grade B – Twice a week or more, she thinks about sex a lot!

Grade C – Weekly

Grade D – Monthly or less, she is not very sexual at all

Grade F – Rarely.  She just doesn’t have a sexual appetite

  • How would you grade your wife’s ability to give you SPT?

Grade A – The best!  Hell, she invented it!

Grade B – Definitely better than average

Grade C – OK, but not very imaginative.

Grade D – Mediocre.  She will do it if I give her a script, otherwise forget it.

Grade F – She has no idea what SPT is, and would have no interest in it!

  • How would you grade your wife’s overall sexual performance in the bedroom?

Grade A – She’s outstanding – the best!

Grade B – She’s is definitely better than average

Grade C – She’s probably about average –not great, but not bad either

Grade D – She is below average and there is definitely room for improvement!

Grade F – Sex?  What’s that?

So, the last question is, does your wife/partner have her degree, or does she have more “course work” to do?  :)

Do You Wish You Had A Smaller Penis?

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I think it is fairly safe to say that virtually all small endowed guys, at one time or another, have wished, dreamed or fantasized about having a bigger cock.  Personally, I know there were times in my life when I would have done anything to have a big, 9” X 6” cock.  The prospect of being able to project the raw, masculine power of a big cock in the bedroom held a great deal of fascination and appeal for me.  I no longer feel that way now, and am actually quite comfortable and content having a small one, but I can’t deny that there was a time when I fantasized about having a big, stud cock.

A few weeks ago, my wife posted the article, Would You Rather Have a Big Cock or a Small Penis (With Teasing)?”  This article was a result of a question one of our male viewers posed to my Hotwife and we both thought it was a fascinating question.  In her response, she left no doubt that she preferred my small one – with teasing.  For her, the sexual and relationship possibilities of me having a small one (with teasing) are simply far greater than if I had a large penis even though it might be more sexually satisfying.  The reality is, she simply loves all of the SPT-related activities, and the added sexual tension and excitement we have as well as my laser focus on her.  So, when I thought about her answer, it honestly didn’t surprise me at all.  Indeed, you can have a lot of fun with a little penis, and I can tell from the positive attitude of many of our “little” followers, that they know this is true too!

Recently, a number of small endowed men have indicated through comments on the Blog, and via personal emails, that they wished that they were even smaller than they were.  We both found this to be a fascinating admission.   I think this notion would thoroughly confuse a lot of people, especially women.  I believe most women would assume that if a guy had a small penis and he could change its size, he would automatically opt for a bigger one.  Interestingly enough, we have even had one woman pose us this same question, because her husband had confessed this to her and she was curious how common it was.

So why would a guy who already self-identifies as having a small penis want to have an even smaller one?   We have thought about this and can only think of two reasons why a guy might actually want to have a smaller penis.  First, let’s say a guy really craves SPT, but he has a 6”+ penis, and his wife isn’t willing to give him SPT because she thinks his penis is big enough as it is.  So, he fantasizes about being smaller so that his wife would be more willing to give him SPT.  Similarly, maybe the guy has a cuckold fantasy that involves seeing his wife with a man who is very well endowed, but maybe because she already considers him adequately endowed, she is not interested in exploring this activity.  Thus, he fantasizes about being smaller so she might seriously consider it.  The only other example I can think of when a guy might actually wish he was smaller, is if he has a huge cock, and most women he has been with considered it too large. While this is rare, I have actually heard a few larger guys admit this.

So here are the questions of the day to both the men and women out there:

  • Have you (or your partner) ever wished your (his) penis was actually smaller than it is?
  • If so, why did you (or he) fantasize about it being even smaller?
  • If so, what size are you, and what size would you like to be?

As always, feel free to add any other thoughts on the subject!

 

What Happens When You Can’t Feel His Small Penis?

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I intentionally chose this photo to make a point.  It really isn’t a woman’s fault if a guy doesn’t have a big cock.  But it also isn’t a man’s fault if a woman has a big pussy.  Why does it have to be anyone’s fault if there is a size mismatch?

Piggybacking on the article about pussy size, I thought this topic was especially pertinent and timely.  We received an email not long ago from an obviously younger, smaller endowed guy who was quite upset.   He placed ALL blame about his small penis size on women. He blamed women for having big pussies, and he actually felt a woman should NEVER use a dildo and be completely content with a small penis.  Well, some women are content with a small one, but some of us also enjoy a larger dildo too, and if we do, what’s so wrong with that?   What this young man failed to understand is, when you’re in a relationship, it shouldn’t be a “blame game.”  What it should be about is good, honest and healthy communication about all matters, including sexual issues.

So back to the question of this article, what should a woman do if she can’t feel her partner’s cock?  By the way, there can be a few different reasons why this is likely to be the case.  (1) There may be a complete size mismatch – he’s very small, and she is very big.  (2) The female partner, through age and or childbirth may have been stretched to the point where she can no longer feel her partner.  In both of these cases, the usual solution is normally to use sex toys like a dildo, a penis extension or a strap-on cock to provide the female partner the feeling of fullness she craves.  By the way, there is nothing wrong with this, and we do know for some couples on this blog, they do use sex toys frequently for this very reason, and for them, it serves as an ideal solution.

There is another way this can happen, and that occurs when a couple opts to use a dildo or sex toys first.  In our case, Steve loves the “sloppy seconds,” but when he enters me after our big boy toy, to be honest, I can hardly feel him or I can’t feel him at all, and when I can’t I tell him, and he cums in like two seconds! :-)   But, in his case, Steve absolutely loves it.  It validates his small penis size to both of us, but it really, really turns him on.  It turns me on too! :-)

So, if you are in a relationship where the female can’t feel your small penis, should she refrain from telling you?  Should she fake orgasms?  Or, should she be completely honest with you, and have fun exploring alternate forms of sexual pleasure?  My hope would be that you both have fun experimenting with new things.

Here are your questions to ponder:

For the Female Readers:

(a)  Can you feel your partner’s penis?

(b)  If not, what do you do to achieve sexual satisfaction?

For the Male Readers:

(a)  Can your partner feel your penis?

(b)  If not, how does it make you feel?

(c)  If not, do you use dildos to supplement your sexual activities?

As always, feel free to add anything else you think is relevant here and thank you for your responses!

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