The “Do Over” Experience

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In our SPT Survey for men, we posed the question, “Prior to your small penis acceptance, did you ever experience any of the following?  (Check all that apply) “

  • Small penis teasing by male (in locker rooms, etc.)
  • Small penis teasing  by a female(s)
  • Humiliation by a female(s) (being sexually inadequate etc.)

Many of our respondents checked one or all of the above experiences.  Our first follow-up question was:  “If any of the above happened to you, what were your initial feelings (Humiliation Embarrassment, Excitement, and Arousal) Please explain.”  Most of the responses we received, not surprisingly, indicated that respondents felt primarily negative emotions/feelings at the time.

Our logical follow-up to these two questions was:  “Do you find yourself looking back on some of those experiences, and wishing you could have a “do-over”?  Please explain.”  The responses we received to this question were surprising to us.  Many of our respondents indicated they would welcome the opportunity to have a “do-over.”  In fact, many said that they have even become aroused and fantasized about having a “do-over” of some of those experiences that earlier in their lives caused them so much angst.

I have personally had all of the experiences in the first question above followed by the negative feelings and emotions described in the first follow-up question as well.  I have also discovered that the past experiences of teasing/humiliation by females to be incredibly arousing in retrospect.  The logical question is why?  I can’t possibly attempt to answer this question for all men, but I believe for me it has everything to do with my small penis acceptance.  The best explanation ever provided to me was by an amazing female sexual therapist who explained to me years ago that I was eroticizing something that had always been a negative emotion/feeling for me.  That explanation really resonated with me, and I know that’s why I now eroticize about those distant memories that at one time created so much inner turmoil for me.

So, this leads me to today’s questions:

  • Have you had an embarrassing/humiliating experience in your past that you would like to share, and if so, do you now find yourself fantasizing about it, and longing for a “do-over?”
  • If so, why do you think you now find something that was so embarrassing and provided such angst for you at the time, is now a source of great arousal?

As always, please feel free to add any of your thoughts and comments!

The Woman’s SPT Survey

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Calling all women in relationships with small-endowed men!

In an effort to find out what women really think about SPT, it was suggested to us by one of our female followers to create a SPT instrument, similar to the one for men, but specifically designed for women to capture a woman’s perspective on the subject.  My Hotwife has volunteered to share her responses so you can get a better sense of the questions, and one woman’s response to them.

Consequently, here is what we would like to do.  We know we have women readers and followers and we want to reach out to you and ask your assistance in filling out the Woman’s SPT Survey Instrument.  If you would be willing to complete the survey, please let us know, and we will send you a copy of it.  Please keep in mind, that your survey answers will be completely anonymous.   If you are a guy, and you know that your wife would be interested in taking the survey, please encourage her to contact us for a copy of the survey instrument.  We really don’t want guys to fill it out for their wives, because for the answers to be meaningful, the survey should be completed by women.  Also, please don’t leave your answers as a comment on the blog as it will be more difficult to compile the data.

Once we have collected enough survey results, we will share a compilation of the anonymous responses on the blog.  This may help other women to better understand why SPT does appeal to some women, the benefits to be derived from it, and how other women can go about providing SPT to their partners.

If you would like to participate in this survey, you can still do so by contacting us directly for a copy of the survey instrument.



Women:  SPT Survey – 1Hotwife

You’re Background:

  • What is your age range:
  • 20-30
  • 30-40
  • 40-50
  • 50-60
  • How long have you been in your current relationship?
  • 1 – 5 years
  • 6 – 10 years
  • 11 – 15 years
  • 16 – 20 years
  • 20+ years
  • Outside of the bedroom, do you consider yourself to be more dominant or submissive? Please rate yourself on a scale of 1- 5, with 1 being totally submissive, 3 being equally Dom-Sub, and 5 being totally dominant.

4 – I am very independent and comfortable making decisions. I am also equally comfortable stepping back and letting someone else make some at times. It really depends on the situation and if I feel I am best qualified.

Your Sexual History & Personal Views on Penis Size:

  • Briefly describe your body, and what attribute(s) do you possess that you believe men are most attracted to?

I am tall, shapely and youthful for my age. I have found men to be most attracted to my breasts (huge nipples), my butt and my long legs. I also have long blonde hair which also goes over well  :)

  • How orgasmic are you? In other words, do you only orgasm through manual, oral or penetration, or are you “multi-orgasmic” and able to experience orgasms in a variety of ways?

I would have to say I am multi orgasmic. My nipples are extremely sensitive and I can almost come just thinking about them being fondled. I love oral and to masturbate and my clitoris loves it too. Penetration works for me even with a little penis because my G spot is low and easy for even my little man to reach. Lastly is my most recently found A spot which is much higher but a much more intense orgasm and only my big cock dildo has been able to find it so far. I am working on other possibilities!  :)

  • How many sexual partners have you had in your lifetime?
  • 1-5
  • 6-10
  • 11 – 15
  • 16-20
  • Over 20
  • How often do you and your husband have sex, and are you both satisfied with the frequency of sex you have? If not, how often would you prefer it?

I would say on average weekly. It does sometimes become 2-3 times a week and sometimes maybe we end up skipping a week. In reality we are VERY sexual and it is incorporated into our lives daily whether it be SPT, the blog or just sex talk in general. We both just love the topic. The fact that it is always on our mind makes for more exciting sex whenever we have it.

  • What is your partner’s erect penis size (both length and girth)?

X-Small  :)  4” x 4.5”

  • How many of your previous partners had a bigger penis than your current husband/partner?

All of them…5

  • Have you ever told your current partner that a previous partner(s) had a bigger penis than he did, and if so, what was his response? e., was he sad and melancholy, or aroused and excited?

Yes. We have both discussed in detail all of our previous partners. It was a great discussion but no extreme emotions that I noticed.

  • How would you compare and contrast the experiences you have had with men of various penis sizes?

My experience has consisted of primarily “average” sized men. Therefore I did not notice a huge difference in the “act” itself due to size. Where they really differ is in skill and creativity. I have had great fun sex and then there was vanilla sex and then down right boring. My little penis man has definitely provided me with the most explosive orgasms I had ever had. Because none of them were “large” I will just have to wait and see if this can be topped.  :)

  • What is you’re ideal penis size preference in length and girth?

Well my big cock dildo is 7” x 5” and I have to say “he” is ideal.

(12A)  If your current partner is smaller than your ideal size, how do you (and he) feel about that?

He loves it and would love for me to experience the “ideal” size for real. I happen to agree with him.

  • If everything else is equal, do you believe that men who have larger cocks are sexually superior to your small endowed partner?

If a man has a big cock then all things are not equal with a little penis. Having said that, it does not mean that you can’t have great sex just because a guy has a little penis, you just have to be more creative and that can sometimes be even more fun and exciting

  • Has your partner ever expressed an interest in wanting to watch you have sex with a man who has a longer penis?

I would have to say “expressed an interest” is putting it mildly. I think he fantasizes about it continuously…lol

(14A) If the answer to Question 14 is yes, how do you feel about this interest?

I didn’t always understand it but now I do. When I do finally take a bull he will not be watching…lol

Dildo Play

  • Do you use dildos that are larger than your partner’s penis during sex play?

Of course. I am pretty sure ALL dildos are larger than my little man’s penis

(15A) If you answered yes, what percentage of the time do you use them during sex?  100% of the time, 75% of the time, 50% of time, etc?


  • What does your larger dildo provide you that your smaller partner can’t? (Check all that apply)
  • A feeling of being stretched
  • A feeling of “fullness”
  • More orgasms
  • Longer lasting orgasms
  • More powerful and intense orgasms

All of the above!

  • If you use dildos during your sex play, does the large dildo always go first?  If so, is there any symbolism in that for you?  (I.e., big cocks always get to go first, etc.?) Please explain.

Yes unless I want little penis sex that I can actually feel but usually my BCD goes first and then he can enjoy his sloppy seconds.

(17A) If you answered yes to the above question, how would you describe the feeling you experience when your smaller partner enters you after the bigger dildo? (Check all that apply)

  • I know my partner is sexually overwhelmed, but he’s very turned on
  • I know my partner is excited by my sexual capacity
  • Validation to me that my partner does have a very small penis and this reality is also quite evident to him as well

All of the above!

You’re Views on Small Penis Teasing/Small Penis Humiliation:

  • Do you believe there is a difference between SPT and SPH, and if so, which do you prefer engaging in and why?

Yes I do believe there is a difference I am just unsure as to where to draw the line. I think it varies with the individual’s / couple’s comfort level. We have found that what we once thought of as humiliation can soon morph into erotic and desirable. So as long as it is desired by both involved I don’t think of that as humiliation. When it is one-sided is more of what I think of humiliating.

  • Why do you think so many small endowed men are attracted to SPT/SPH?

First of all I do not think it is limited to just small endowed men. Men are turned on by ANY focus on their penis big or small. I think smaller endowed men tend to be MORE focused on their little penises and to have a woman show interest in it is a HUGE turn on for them.

  • A lot of women are not comfortable acknowledging that their partner doesn’t “measure up.” How were you able to become comfortable acknowledging your partner’s smallness?

I have a very open and honest relationship with my husband. Once HE accepted that he had a small penis, it became easy for me to accept it as well. It is basically just stating a fact that we both know to be true.

  • Whose idea was it to bring SPT/SPH into your relationship, and how many years have you been doing it?

It really just came along naturally with acceptance but it originated from him

  • Inside the bedroom, would you consider yourself to be more dominant or submissive?  Please rate yourself on a scale of 1-5, with 1 being totally submissive, 3 being equally Dom-Sub, and 5 being totally dominant.

This is funny because society taught me to think I wanted an alpha male for most of my life but in my later years, I would have to say that my comfort is truly being a Dom. I like to be pleasured and the most pleasurable sex I have had is with my little sub. I still can have rough aggressive sex when I want it…I just have to say so.  :) 

  • Inside the bedroom, would you consider your partner to be more dominant or submissive? Please rate your partner on a scale of 1-5, with 1 being totally submissive, 3 being equally Dom-Sub, and 5 being totally dominant.

3 – He really is a 2 but is able to go both ways if I request it.  :) 

(223A) If you answered 1-2 for your partner, do you have any negative feelings with him being a submissive male in the bedroom, or are you quite comfortable with him being that way?

I am comfortable with whatever role he plays because we both in the end will be pleasured by it

  • How often do you provide your partner with SPT?
  • Daily
  • Weekly
  • Monthly
  • Occasionally, but not regularly
  • As you see it, what are the major benefits you have realized in providing your husband with SPT? Please look at the list below and rate all of the examples from 0 (no benefit) to 5 (very beneficial).
Benefits of Small Penis Teasing Please Rate the Benefits  on a Scale of 0-5
1. I love the power and control SPT gives me in our relationship


2. SPT keeps my partner more focused on me


3. My partner knows he must compensate for his small penis in the bedroom


4. My partner is much more sexually open because of SPT


5. My partner is more willing do things for me or with me outside the bedroom


6. My partner considers me his “Hotwife”


7. SPT makes our sex life more exciting and varied


8. SPT creates a level of deeper intimacy and vulnerability


9. SPT demonstrates the character strength of my partner: he can joke with me about a deeply seated fear. That demonstrates great trust and confidence


10. SPT allows me to challenge the male myth of the penis and go beyond the stereotypical male-female model of relationship


11. Please list any other benefits you have derived from SPT not listed above  
SPT has taken our sex life to a whole other level. We have literally kicked it up a notch or two. We have expanded our boundaries to incorporate many new and exciting things.


  • Small Penis teasing-related activities can run the gambit from simple verbal comments to cock comparisons, to being outed, etc.  Please look at the list below and rate all of the examples of SPT related activities you engage in from 0 (not involved in it) to 5 (very exciting for me).  At the end, please feel free to add any other example of SPT related activities that you enjoy and rate them as well.
Small Penis Teasing Possibilities Please Rate Your Interest on a Scale of 0-5
1. SPT comments that are more mild or subtle “hints” that he doesn’t measure up


2. SPT comments that are more direct and open


3. Outing my partner to a girlfriend(s) or others


4. Cock or Dildo Comparisons


5. Sloppy seconds – which is taken to mean your partner goes second after you have been pleasured by a larger dildo


6. Orgasm Control/ Denial occasionally – perhaps just once in a while


7. Orgasm Control/ Denial for a sustained period of time (1 month or more)


8. Withholding Sex– perhaps just once in a while


9. Withholding Sex for a sustained period of time (1 month or more)


10. Fantasy Cuckolding my partner


11. Real life Cuckolding my partner


12. Male Chastity


13. Please list any other form of SPT/SPH that you either engage in or would like to do and please rate it.  
Man panties! I just love him in his little panties!


  • Has open discussion about SPT/SPH affected the overall flow of communication in your relationship and if so, how?

It is because we had open communication in our relationship already that allowed us to talk about and explore SPT/SPH together.

  • Is there anything else you feel is important about SPT that is not reflected in the questions above, but that you would like to add?

I think if a man communicates a desire for SPT/SPH then his partner should embrace that and have fun with it. I know I do.  :) 

  • For other women, who may be on the fence about engaging in SPT/SPH with their small endowed partners, what advice would you give them?

Pull your stick out of the mud and have some fun with your little man. He will love it and it is all good, harmless fun. You set your own boundaries and never do anything that you are uncomfortable with. Communicate!



To Our Female Followers

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We are very fortunate to have as many female followers as we do on this blog.  It goes without saying that we really enjoy and look forward to your thoughts and comments on the variety of subjects that we post on here.  It helps to provide us with a more balanced view and we always appreciate your contributions.

If you are a guy who reads our blog and you share it with your female partner, by all means, encourage your partner to participate too!  We do have some couples who participate together and it can be a lot of fun, and definitely adds a lot to our ongoing discussions on a wide range of topics.

We know we have some female “lurkers” too, women who read, but aren’t quite comfortable in participating.  We would definitely like to encourage you to participate as well, and can assure you that your anonymity is guaranteed.  When you propose a comment the first time, you will be asked for a “name”, and you can simply choose an alias if you would like too, and that is all that appears with your comment.  Your email address is invisible to the general public, so your privacy is guaranteed.  The first time you comment, it is sent to us for “Moderation,” and once we approve your initial post, you will be able to contribute going forward without Moderation.

We also have a new and exciting project in the works that definitely requires more female participation in order to be successful. We have created an SPT Survey that was specifically designed for women, and we would really enjoy hearing from our female followers on what they think about this fascinating topic.  Please contact us if you would be interested in participating in this survey.

If you are a female partner of one of our current male followers, or are a female (single or married) who finds our blog interesting or helpful, please feel free to contribute.  From time to time, we also get emails from women who would like to propose a topic for a future article, and we really appreciate those too.  We also enjoy hearing feedback about the blog too.  What topics do you like, which ones would you like more of, or less of, etc? Is there a topic that you would like to see us cover, that we haven’t?  So, by all means, feel free to contribute here, or send one of us an email and let us know you’re out there!




The Small Penis Relationship Continuum

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I have recently been engaged in a fascinating discussion with one of our female followers on small penis related issues.  We have talked in-depth about a wide range of issues, and I explained to her that I have been working on a concept for some time now, that I refer to as a “Small Penis Relationship Continuum.  I would like to attempt to describe this concept to those of you who are our followers, and then let you weigh in on what you think about it.

Definition:  To begin with, we need a definition of what a Small Penis Relationship is.  For me, I would define it as follows:  “A relationship where the male’s real or perceived small penis size, or even the fear of having a small penis, is acknowledged and embraced in the relationship. I say real or perceived because there is no “size requirement” to be in such a relationship.  Many men of average and even above average penis size can and do enjoy this kind of relationship.”

Fantasy/Reality Continuum: The fantasy-reality continuum is critical to understand how this relationship was established.  This is especially important in the beginning when the “small penis talk” is held:  depending on where the male partner falls on the scale, and on how truly important this is for the female, the talk will have very different challenges and develop unique patterns toward a balanced solution for the couple. The talk then lies the groundwork for building the specific “small penis relationship” that fits for the couple. If it’s real for both, the point of balance will require tactics of compensation. If it’s real for him, but not important for her, the SPT activity will be focused to serve his needs and have the “edge of truth”. If it’s not real for him, the SPT will have a special edge too – the edge of “vulnerability”: you’re admitting this topic matters to you; even if you’re not small, you’re showing yourself vulnerable to your partner.

Thus, once the “small penis relationship” has been established, regardless of whether it is rooted in fantasy or reality, it then becomes important for you and your partner to find your comfort zone in it.  For example, for some couples it may be strictly a fantasy based relationship.  While the male may have a small penis, it is not the sole focus of the relationship, so their choice of activities are more fantasy driven.  For another couple, they may be in the center of the continuum and may look at it like their relationship is part fantasy but also part reality based as well.  And for other couples, at the far right of the continuum they may look at their small penis relationship as completely reality based.  So what they decide to do is based solely on the reality that the male in the relationship does have a small penis.  Thus, this continuum may look like this:

Fantasy Based→ Part Fantasy/Part Reality Based→ Reality Based

Frequency Continuum:  Similarly, there is also a Frequency Continuum, which is a punctual description of how often penis size drives sexuality within a couple.  It tells us some about how the “small penis relationship” is, in the here and now.  For example some couples, especially for those whose relationship is more fantasy based, they may engage in small penis related activities only occasionally as a break or interlude from their “normal” sexual practices.  Other couples may engage in these activities more frequently, but not all the time.  But for those couples, especially those in a “reality based” small penis relationship, they may engage in small penis activities all or most of the time.  This continuum would simply look like this:

Occasional → Frequently → Permanently

The Pervasiveness Continuum:   There is also a third continuum which ties together both the fantasy/reality and frequency continuums together.  The question to be answered is, how pervasive is the small penis theme in your relationship?  Is it the one and only theme (with plenty of expressions, ranging from role play to dildo play or cuckolding), or is it one theme among many?  For example, perhaps the small penis theme is one of two themes in your sexual repertoire, with the other theme being “regular” or romantic sex in which there is no focus on penis size at all.  In this case, the small penis theme is just one out of two, and thus it “competes” with only one other “rival” source of sexual excitement and attention for the couple.  For another couple, they may have three or more sexual “themes” garnering attention and interest for the couple.  So in the Pervasiveness Continuum, so frequently is the small penis theme prevalent in your relationship?  Is there:

Occasional Focus→ Frequent Focus → Sole Focus

So, when you look at these three continuums and the variables in each one, you can clearly see how many possible combinations and variety there can be for a couple in a small penis relationship.

A Cascading Menu of Options:  Whether you are in a fantasy based or reality based small penis relationship, and regardless of the frequency and pervasiveness with which you engage in these activities, there is a “menu” of options you have to choose from.  So, imagine if you will, having the following “drop down” ala carte menu of potential activities:

The “Menu”
1 SPT/SPH comments that are more mild or subtle “hints” that the male doesn’t measure up
2 SPT/SPH comments that are more direct and open
3 Role-Play Scenarios
4 Being Outed by your wife or partner where your fully erect size is stated
5 Self-Outing – where you go the gym, a nude beach, etc., and out yourself, (but your soft size leaves doubt about your fully aroused size)
6 Cock or Dildo Comparisons
7 Dildo Play
8 Sloppy seconds – which is taken to mean you go second after your wife has been pleasured by a larger dildo, or it can also mean going second after performing oral sex on your partner
9 Orgasm Denial occasionally – perhaps just once in a while
10 Orgasm Denial for a sustained period of time (1 month or more)
11 Withholding Sex– perhaps just once in a while
12 Withholding Sex for a sustained period of time (1 month or more)
13 Male Chastity
14 Female-Led or Dom-sub Relationship
15 Panties
16 Fantasy Cuckolding
17 Real Life Cuckolding
18 Other options 

Even within these “activities” there are options.  For example, some couples may choose not to use dildos at all, while another couple might choose to use them 25-50% of the time, and another couple might opt to use them all the time.  It’s the same thing with everything else on the list.  You and your partner decide what options you like, which ones you don’t, and how frequently you want to engage in any of them.

Let me try to explain this overall concept with a couple of examples.  The woman I have been corresponding with is awesome.  Her husband has a very “average” cock size, but he mustered up the courage to explain to her that he would like SPT.  While she was admittedly a little apprehensive at first, she really appreciated his willingness to open himself up and be vulnerable to her.  So, they began engaging in SPT from more of a fantasy based position and only occasionally.  From the “drop down” menu they have dabbled in a few things but seem to enjoy the light SPT and role play scenarios.  For them, they acknowledge that they are half-way between fantasy and reality. On frequency, they are clearly on the occasional end right now: but this changes over time. And finally, on importance or pervasiveness they’re again in the middle: it’s not their only sexual theme, but it is one of two and it occupies at least 50% of their mental space. In fact, given that the alternative is often “regular sex,” this theme gets more thought and attention from them. For them, where they have “landed” in the continuum is the perfect place for them.

For other couples, they may be more in the middle of the continuum in that their small penis relationship is part fantasy/part reality based and they might engage in activities in a more frequent but still not permanent basis, and they may also be in the middle in the pervasiveness continuum.  They may also have a more exhaustive list of activities they engage in, but there may still be some that hold no interest for them at all.

And finally, there are also couples like me and my wife who are on the right side of all three continuums.  For us, our small penis relationship is grounded completely on reality and is a 24-7 lifestyle.  We also have engaged in most of the activities on the “Drop Down” menu and enjoy them all.

The other point I want to underscore is there are options, plenty of options for couples to choose from.  There is no right way or wrong way to have a “small penis relationship” or what it needs to consist of, because it is solely up to you and your partner.  Wherever a couple lands on these three continuums, and as long as they are both in their comfort level and traveling parallel paths,  a small penis relationship can be defined how you want to define it and then hopefully, you can just have a lot of fun exploring it together.

What do the rest of you think?  Where do you fit on the Small Penis Relationship continuum?

The “Outing” of Steve

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“Outing” is one of those fascinating topics that I have learned about through interaction on the blog. It still amazes me just how many guys want to be “outed.”  When I think about outing, there are essentially two kinds of outing that we have talked about: (1) being outed by your female partner, or (2) self-outing.  To me, the difference is when you are outed by your partner it’s clear it’s about his erection size, while self-outing on nude beaches or in showers or locker rooms, guys are typically in a soft state which leaves some doubt as to the real penis size since there are “growers and showers.” Thus for Steve, while self-outing has little appeal, I know being outed by me is much more exciting and powerful for him.

I have known Steve has wanted to be “outed” for some time now, and while I wasn’t opposed to it at all, I really hadn’t had the opportunity… until recently. But that has all changed now, because he has been outed!  :)

This is how it all came about.  I got a call from one of my best friends who was having some relationship issues and she desperately wanted to talk with me about them.  We decided to have a GNO (Girls Night Out) so we could catch up and she invited me over last weekend to spend the night.

I have known her for about 15 years of which she has been married for the past 14 years.  We have gone out with them as couples, and have often gone to strip clubs together, after dinner, just to have a little titillating excitement and fun.  She is tall, has a great body, fun personality and guys are always attracted to her.  Despite the fact that we are about 15 years difference in age, whenever we are together, people often think we are sisters.  We are likeminded sexually and can talk about anything and everything.

We went to a local bar and I quickly found out what was troubling her.  While she loves her husband, she was not getting the amount of sex that she needed, and her husband just wasn’t giving her the kind of attention that she craved either. But, one of her co-workers was giving her plenty of attention, and she admitted that she even wanted to have sex with him.  She was torn about what to do, and had even confessed all of this to her husband – including that she wanted to have some wild sex with the other guy. The interesting thing is, he didn’t say no. They have actually talked about a 3-some before with another woman. She also told me that he was very submissive.

At that point, I said, “Well, maybe he’s a cuckold?”  She looked at me with a quizzical expression and said, “A what?”  I said, “A cuckold, a guy that wants his wife to have sex with other men, and sometimes they even like to watch.”  I know I really surprised her when I said, “Steve is a cuckold, and wants me to experience big cock sex” She was surprised and smiled, and said,“Really?” 

She then said that her husband was big and held her hands apart and said that he was about “this big.”  The distance seemed to be about 7-8 inches. I then held up one hand, just a finger and thumb, about 4″ apart and said this is how big Steve is. I went on to explain that Steve wanted me to experience big cock sex because I had never had it, and I admitted that I really wanted it too. I told her that my biological clock is ticking and I said, “If I will ever experience big cock sex, it’s now or never.”   I continued on and said, “Even though Steve has a very small penis, he IS an oral master.”  She just smiled, and said, “That’s important to me too!

She admitted that a big cock was a necessity for her and that her first partner was huge and he “ruined her”  :)   I asked her how she knew this guy who was hitting on her was big, and she said, “I checked out his package.  :)   Just to be clear, I didn’t encourage her to have sex with the guy who was hitting on her, but what I did encourage her to do was to talk more about what she was feeling with her husband and see where that led.  I also reiterated the obvious potential pitfalls of “swimming in the company pond” as it were.

To be honest, being able to have such an open and honest discussion about relationships, sex, and penis size was awesome.  I actually felt it was liberating in a way, because it gave me a chance to talk to another woman about my desire to experience big cock sex, and she totally understands why I’m VERY curious about it.  In a way, I think she was even somewhat envious that Steve and I have a cuckold relationship that will allow for this to happen.

How did I feel about “outing” Steve?  It was a major turn on for me, primarily because I knew how much it would turn him on, and it sure did.  At one point she had to use the restroom, and when she excused herself, I sent Steve a selfie of the two of us smiling and obviously feeling pretty good after I don’t know how many drinks, and I simply added, “You have been outed!”  With a smiley face!   His reaction was, “OMG, really?”  I simply responded back with “Yes little cuck.”  I know it tortured him to have to wait for all the details until I got home the next day!  :)

Steve’s Reaction in his own words:

I was incredibly and immediately aroused!  We had talked about outing before, but I never knew if it would happen or not, and I honestly didn’t even know if it would be as erotic in reality as it was as a fantasy.  But, it was even more exciting in reality.  Of course, I naturally wanted to know all of the details, but I would have to wait until the next day to find them all out.  In the meantime, I was awake all night dying to hear them.

The person she outed me to was also perfect in every way.  Because she is a close friend, I felt entirely confident that she wouldn’t “broadcast” my lack of endowment to the entire civilized world.  She is also very attractive, and highly sexual. But, probably the best part of all is, she is sexually honest about being a “Size Queen” who places a premium on cock size for sexual satisfaction.  That made it all the more erotic than if she had “outed” me to someone who was ambivalent about cock size. There is also something about another women not only knowing that you have a very small penis, but also knows your exact erect penis size measurement that is incredibly exciting too.  The fact that she knows I only have a 4” erect penis is intimate knowledge about me that she will always possess, and there is something about that which is a major turn on for me.


The interesting thing about all of this is my BF and I have been texting each other nonstop ever since.  We have concluded that we need to have another “GNO” just to talk about the last Girls Night Out!  :)    We also decided that the next time we get together that it should be at my place.  This of course will take Steve’s “outing” to the next logical step – he will be around the woman who knows he has a little 4” penis!  :)

So, what do the rest of you think about our little “outing” adventure?

Do You Have a Hotwife?

Hotwife 14 - Copy

When most of us think of the term “Hotwife” we usually associate it with the swinging or cuckolding cultures, but it doesn’t have to be associated with either.  You can have a “Hotwife” – or, if you prefer “Hot Wife” (two words) and it can simply mean that your wife is hot!    I’m lucky.  I have a beautiful and simply stunningly attractive wife.  Because she is a tall, blue-eyed blonde with an engaging smile, she is the kind of woman that, even if you were happily married, you would steal a second glance.   She would probably deny this, but she also radiates sexual energy.  There are just some women, that when you see them, you think to yourself, “She’s hot!”  My wife is one of those women.  She is not just 1Hotwife on the blog, she is ONE HOT WIFE!   I love thinking of her as a Hotwife!

In the recent article I wrote, How I Stifled My Wife’s Sexuality, I explained how my penis size insecurities stifled my wife’s sexuality in the bedroom.  Well, I will also admit that I felt threatened and yes, even jealous about other men being attracted to my wife.  But, with my small penis acceptance, everything changed both inside and outside the bedroom, and to be honest, it wasn’t a moment too soon and was the best thing that ever happened in our relationship.  It allowed me to look at my wife in a new and exciting way and I could acknowledge to myself and to her just how attractive and desirable she was.

So, the title of this post is, Do You Have a Hotwife?  Well, I can only speak for myself, but to me, the answer is obvious, yes, I do have a Hotwife.  The benefits of telling your wife she is a “Hotwife” can be numerous too and include:

Confidence:  When you think your wife is a Hotwife and you tell her, it can give her a lot of confidence.  But it’s even deeper than that.  Everyone LOVES compliments and that includes your Hotwife.  When was the last time you complimented her on how she looks, a new hair style, or how great she looks in that new blouse or anything else for that matter?  If she goes to work and other guys are feeding this need and you’re not she is left wondering why do other guys notice me, but my own husband doesn’t?  It may be flattering to her that other guys notice, but it’s deflating when her own partner never makes a positive comment.  And don’t give the excuse, “Oh my wife knows what I think.  We have been married so long, she has to know.”  Compliments never get old and they feed the confidence.  To be honest, I know I still need to do a better job with this, but I am trying to be much more aware of the need to be more vocal about this.  By the way, when my wife feels like a Hotwife that translates into her feeling more desirable. She feels a lot more confidence and sexual energy, and that translates into more sex for me!  :)

Motivation (Her):  Being a Hotwife can serve as a major source of motivation for a woman.  If a woman feels like a Hotwife, it can inspire her to look even better, and to be in better shape.  If my Hotwife gains a half a pound, it’s damn near a catastrophe.  She wants to look her best both in and out of clothes, so she is very motivated to go to the gym and watch what she eats, because she wants to feel like a Hotwife.

Motivation (Him):  Surprisingly, having a Hotwife can (or should) provide motivation to the man to be a “Hot Husband.”  It should be unacceptable for a man to insist his wife look like a Hotwife, while he gets a free pass.  No Hotwife is going to want work hard to look her best and have a partner who is a couch potato.  If having a Hotwife doesn’t inspire you to want to look your best, it should.

Inspiration & Validation:  Having a Hotwife is inspiring. My wife is in a little bit of denial about this, but I have witnessed how other men look at my wife with my own eyes.  I have literally seen men walk into walls or fall off chairs because they are fixated on her. They might be attracted to her because she is a tall, striking blonde, or because of her great tits, ass or legs.  Whatever the reason, there is no doubt that men are fixated on my Hotwife.

Here is a funny but true story.  One time my wife had to work with a guy that she knows is a major “perv.”  He’s married, but just has this constant bad habit of saying things that are totally inappropriate and even sexually suggestive.  So he is working with my wife one time, and she felt like he was staring at her cleavage, which he was, and he just blurted out, “You have great tits.”  Now, if he had said that to anyone else, he might have gotten slapped in the face or called up to the sexual harassment committee but because my wife was not threatened at all, she just brushed it off.   Now, when she told me that story later I found it humorous, and I said, “Well, even though it was inappropriate, I’m sure he was just verbalizing what every other guy is thinking, but would never dare to say. I have to give him credit for at least being honest.”

Here’s another example.  As I said, I love my wife’s body, and everything I say about it is true.  I especially love my wife’s breasts and obviously other guys do too.  I think they are perfect in every way.  I have told her many times over the years, that she had the breasts of an 18-year old.  They are perky and firm – just perfect.  By the way, the photo above was no accident, I chose it because this woman’s breasts look almost identical to my Hotwife’s.  Several years ago, she was in her upper 40’s and decided to explore the idea of breast implants.  I told her that her breasts were perfect, but I think she wanted them a little more “enhanced.” Well, we went in to see the surgeon to get an opinion.  She took off her clothes, and what do you think were the first words out of his mouth?  He said, “You have the breasts of an 18-year old.”  I thought to myself, “Where have you heard that before?  Oh, wait, I said that!   She decided not to go through with it, but for me, and I think even for her, to hear a doctor who sees breasts all day long say the same thing to her at that age was more validation.

I love having a Hotwife.  She obviously has the body, but she also has the personality, and seeing the irrefutable evidence that I know other guys are turned on by my wife as well, is actually very exciting!

So here are your questions:


  • Do you think of your wife as a Hotwife? If so, why, and if not, why not?
  • If she doesn’t consider herself to be one, do you wish she would?
  • If you know your wife commands the attention of other men, does that turn you on or off?


  • Are you a Hotwife? Does your husband consider you one?
  • If not, do you wish your husband thought of you as a Hotwife?

As always, feel free to add your thoughts!



Why I Love Comparing Cocks

Steve Vs. Dildo - Copy Over the last three years, I have really enjoyed participating in the LSP blog and having the opportunity to interact with so many interesting small endowed men.  I have especially enjoyed attempting to answer your questions, and also reading your SPT survey results.  One of the remarkable things I have learned is how eager these men have been to share with me what turns them on the most and explain why these things turn them on.  Your honesty has been refreshing and allowed me to look inside the mind of men with small penises.

For the woman who wants to unlock the mind of her small endowed husband, the “Why” is just as important as the “What” in terms of understanding why things turn them on.  In analyzing the results of the SPT Survey, Question 22 was particularly informative. On a scale of 0-5, with 0 (no interest) to 5 (very high interest), participants were asked to provide their most desirable forms of SPT.  One of the most favorite forms of SPT was Cock or Dildo Comparisons, with an average score of 4.42. Why are cock comparisons so appealing for the small endowed man?  There are several reasons that come to mind.

First, the man who enjoys cock comparisons, and knows that he doesn’t measure up is usually very secure with his penis size, and even his relationship.  Obviously, if he wasn’t, he wouldn’t want to be compared to other men, and would definitely not want to be compared with your former partners or any other men.  So first and foremost, his acceptance and “enlightened” attitude have a lot to do with it.  This is not insignificant and is actually very important to sexual honesty.

Second, and because he is comfortable with his small endowment, he is very aroused by the “taboo” idea that his partner would be open enough to affirm this obvious “truth” for him.  After all, he already knows it’s true, he also knows that you know it too, but when his female partner acknowledges this truth too, it can be as liberating as it is arousing for him. So, if you’re a woman reading this, but you haven’t quite been able to provide this for your partner, but you would like to, here are some ideas on how to get started:

  • Understanding his Desire: The first thing a woman should do if her partner has expressed an interest in cock comparisons, is to ask him specifically why it is such a turn on for him.  Ask him direct questions as to what about it turns him on, and what kind of comparisons he is interested in.  The more you understand the psychology behind it for him, the better apt you are to be able to provide it for him.
  • Becoming “Cock Centric”: A lot of women are not “cock centric” in that they typically don’t focus on inches or specific penis sizes.  The more you understand what the average penis size is, and what size your partner is by comparison, the more it will set the stage to provide him with an honest cock comparison.  One of the fun sites to visit is the Visualizer where a woman (or couple) can go in and insert the length and girth of her partner and compare him with other guys, including the “ideal woman’s size preference,” other Visualizer members, porn stars, etc.  It can be a lot of fun comparing and contrasting various lengths and girths, and total volume. The image above is a comparison of my husband Steve’s small, 4” penis next to the size of my favorite dildo!  Obviously, there is quite a noticeable difference.  :-)
  • Comparison with Former Partners:  For the man who is super turned on by cock comparisons, there is no more real comparison for him than for you to compare his penis with those of your former lovers.  How does he measure up by comparison?  He will also want to know your thoughts, feelings when confronted with those other cocks.  One of our favorite female contributors, Rougedmount posted just such an article on her blog on April 28, 2014, called, “My Lovers Cocks.”  In reading that description and knowing the men that frequent our blog, I doubt few could read it without fantasizing that it was their wife providing such vivid and descriptive details.
  • The Difference: Another thing that really turns men on who crave cock comparisons, is having you describe the physical difference/feelings and sensations you have experienced with different sized cocks.  It’s also important to describe the psychological differences you experience between seeing a small, average or large one.
  • Your Ideal Cock Size Preference: Have you ever told your partner what your ideal cock size was?  If not, knowing what your ideal is, would definitely turn him on too.  The more descriptive you are the better.  For example, how long is your ideal cock?  How thick would it be, how big would his balls be?  What would be the ideal shape of the cock head, etc.?  Do you prefer circumcised or uncircumcised cocks?  The more details you provide, the better because these are all things that will defintely turn him on.
  • Being Proactive: Don’t wait for him to bring it up, be proactive and seek opportunities to do visual cock comparisons frequently.   Suggest you and your partner watch erotic movies, or video clips, etc., and make sure you compare your partner to those guys you see on screen. And don’t be bashful about telling him when you see a nice looking or perfect sized cock.   How does your partner measure up?  For those who use sex toys, how does your partner compare with your favorite dildo?  He would love these kinds of comparisons, and would especially appreciate it if you initiated it. Whenever we use my big boy toy, I almost always hold it up next to his little penis and I can tell that it turns him on to see how much smaller he is in comparison.  :-)

These are just a few examples of how you can provide your partner with the cock comparisons he is craving, but I’m sure there are other ideas you can think of too!  Not only is this desire of his easy to provide, it can actually be fun and erotic for you as well.  Trust me, you will be the beneficiary of his arousal!  :-)

Finally, to answer the question of this post, why do I love comparing cocks?  First and foremost, I love it because it turns my husband on.  As I have said throughout this blog, I can’t provide my husband the sexual excitement he craves if he doesn’t share it with me what turns him on, and when I see how hard his stiff little penis gets when I do it, its proof positive he loves it.  Why would a woman not want to turn her partner on?  Secondly, I love it because to be honest, I love looking at penises and cocks of all sizes and shapes.  I think it is fun, exciting and helps to keep me in the mood!  :-)

Here are today’s questions:


  • Does your partner provide cock comparisons for you?
  • If so, what kinds of cock comparisons turn you on the most and why?
  • If not, would you like for her to do it?


  • Have you ever compared your partner’s cock with others?
  • If so, what kind of cock comparisons do you do, and does your partner like it?
  • Do you like it, and if so, why?
  • If you haven’t provided your partner with Cock Comparisons, is this something you are considering, or you have no interest in?

As always please feel free to add anything else you feel is relevant to the topic.  And if there are different examples of cock comparisons not listed above, please feel free to share them. Thanks for your responses!


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